Did we make it?

Yes, we did.

Did anyone see Pepa wiggling about in her bag?

Yes, they did.

Was it the driver?

No it wasn't, and that's the important thing.

It was a nervy five minute wait in the queue, especially when the driver opened the doors and everyone moved forward. Pepa squirmed about in the bag, but I managed to sneak her past the driver and shot up the back

As it was 3pm the bus was half empty so no one saw when I opened the bag up so Pepa could poke her head out and get some air. It was hot and stuffy on the bus and I was glad it was only for two and a half hours. At Huelva the driver cut off the air con so the bus boiled up, as did Pepa.

So who did see her?
Two American women had spotted her in the queue at Plaza de Armas.
'We knew you had a doggy in there,' said one as Pepa stumbled out the bag in Ayamonte. 'It was wiggling the whole time in the queue.'
So there you go, if you need to transport your dog on a bus then it's possible. I don't know why they don't allow them anyway, I'd happily pay an extra charge.
It was definitely worth the risk. Watching Pepa run about the beach and play in the sea was great fun. She loved it, but is now depressed to be back in the oven flat in Seville.
I'm off on holiday now to Fuerteventura so won't be writing until the middle of September, hopefully with some stories when I get back.

A smuggler's life for me?

Ho Ho Ho and a bottle of Spanish port, dogport.

Everyone is at the beach, at least everyone I know in Seville, which is five people at the moment because in August this place is deserted.

The dilema is, shall I risk smuggling my dog, Pepa, a Westie, on the bus this Thursday? If I don't then I'll be stuck at home all weekend while my lady and her family sun it up, and I'll be left here socrching in the Sevillian heat. I have a special doggy carrier bag that I'm going to disguise with my t-shirt.

I've never tried it before, never had to, but what if I get caught?

Here's my worst case scenario.

I make it on the bus. Pepa has kept still and I've managed to get past the driver and have a free seat next to me, I relax. But half way through the journey a chubby Spanish grandmother, who is petrified of dogs, especially Westies because when she was seven a Westie attacked her favourite doll, has to sit on the only free seat, next to me.

She squeezes up, making me shift over, and peers down between my legs.

Then she screams.

'HAY UNA PERRA, HAY UNA PERRA, ME VA A MORDER - it's going to bite me.'

'Shit,' I mutter. The driver storms over.

'You have to put it underneath,' he says, pointing towards the door.

'I can't, it's over 40 degrees, it'll die.'

'Well you have to get off the bus.'

'But we're in the middle of an abandoned village, how will I get back?'

'Me va a morder,' says the abuela.

'You have to get off the bus,' says the driver. Everyone else starts to tut and moan, and they force me off the
bus.

Then I have to pay 100 euros for a taxi to the beach.

That's my worst case scenerio, my best is that I'll get away with it, either way, log in next week to find out what happened.

Dia de la Virgen de los Reyes

I’d never seen the procession of the Virgen de los Reyes before this morning. Getting up at 7am on a Sunday isn’t my idea of fun, especially after celebrating Sevilla’s 3v1 victory over Barca last night, but it was worth the early morning agony.

The story behind the importance of the Virgen de los Reyes is that Luis IX donated the Virgen when King San Fernando conquered Seville in the 13th century. The legend states that San Fernando had already seen the Virgen in his dreams and she had helped him win Seville back from the Muslims, which is why he chose her for the patron, and why the 15th of August is such an important day for Sevillanos.

The Virgen de los Reyes only leaves the Cathedral on the 15th of August. During Semana Santa, all the other Virgens and Christs from the processions salute her as they pass through the Cathedral. Every time Sevilla F.C win a trophy they offer it to the Virgen de los Reyes as a matter of pride. She always lets them keep the trophy.
We had a great spot on the corner of Alemanes and Avenida de Constitucion. We had to get there for about 7.40am, the Virgen leaves at 8am. The procession began with its normal brass band, and was followed by members of the association. Then the Virgen came waltzing down Calle Alemanes until it stopped at the end facing the sun.
“Watch now,’ my fiancee’s father said. “The sun will shine on her face.” The procession was timed to perfection. As the choir sang the sun passed round and lit up the Virgen. Then she continued her route along the Avenue and back to the Cathedral.

Here’s the video if you’re a fan, if not then skip to the funny one below.



This was taken a couple of hours after. Notice the bloke in the sexy pink tie. He was sitting on the steps of the Cathedral singing and clapping to Sevillanos and tourists. Sometimes the heat over here does strange things to people, and he’s first hand evidence.

Looking for a job teaching in Seville?

It was almost five years ago that I arrived in Seville hoping to find a job teaching. I was lucky; within 24 hours I’d found a flat in Triana and a job at Giralda Centre. Fair enough my roommates turned out to be a handful, and I only stayed with Giralda centre for one year (more on that later), but it was a start, and if I hadn’t taken the plunge, then now I’d probably be a primary school teacher in Bognor.


When to arrive

The best time to arrive in Seville looking for work is the last weekend in August. A lot of language academies are closed at the moment but once they open you want to be the first to hand in your CV in person. You could get ahead of yourself by sending your CV now, but you really need to show your face, whether it’s pretty or not, to show that you are keen on living and working in Seville.

How to get a job

Once you arrive, get some smart clothes on, grab a cold bottle of water because it’s still going to be in the 40’s, and get walking. In my first week here I went round to all the language academies. I learnt the lesson that between 2pm and 6pm no one is about, so take a break.

You need to speak with the director or Head of recruitment for the larger institutions. If they are not around then get their name and book an appointment to see or telephone them. Some of the larger academies will just take your CV and chuck it on the pile with the rest, but you need to pester if you’re keen on finding a job. Don’t take no for an answer.

This is the technique I used in Ecuador, Brazil, Australia, and Seville. I found jobs in all places within a week, maybe they weren’t great places to start, but be patient.

What you need to get a job

• Cambridge Celta or Trinity Tesol. (No Teltas; dodgy Celta’s from Thailand)

• For the best academies you need at least a year’s experience, sometimes two.

• A working knowledge of Spanish is a bonus.

• Patience. The kids and teenagers can be hectic at times, but they’re normally all right.

• Basic IT skills. A lot of academies are using white board technology.

• A passion to teach. A lot of teachers come here but don’t enjoy teaching, they rarely last more than one year.

• A copy of English Grammar in Use by Raymond Murphy. Especially if you’re teaching adults, Sevillianos want to know why for everything.

A lot of Language Academies do their recruitment on-line. Here are some links to Language Academies.

I work for English Language Institute. We are looking for teachers at the moment. http://www.eli.es/es/pages/4/work-with-us.html

The British Institute; our main rivals, I suppose it wouldn’t hurt if I gave you their details. http://www.ibsevilla.es/work.html

Clic. I’ve heard good references from teachers working here. They also offer teacher training courses. http://www.clic.es/en/about-clic-ih/work-with-clic-ih.html

Linc. An old mate used to work here; he said it was all right.
http://www.lincspanishschool.com/linc-contact.php

I worked here in my first year. If I hadn’t then I’d never have the lady of my life, yes she was my student. Be careful here though because they didn’t used to give you a long term contract, but maybe things have changed.
http://www.giraldacenter.com/contact.asp

A couple of my mates work here; also good to work for.
http://www.emacarena.com/

The rest of these I don’t know much about, but you can give them a try.
http://www.passportsevilla.com/

http://www.berlitz.es/

http://www.cccs.es/

http://www.stjames.es/

http://www.wsi.es/

http://www.londoncentre.es/

http://www.english1sevilla.com/masinfo.htm  

Last words of wisdom

If you like small cities with lots of bars, restaurants, and places to visit at the weekend then Seville could be ideal for you. I found it hard in my first two years to get used to the culture and relaxed way of life and sometimes I have those ‘Hate Sevilla’ days when I wish I was somewhere else, but Seville has a lot to offer EFL Teachers looking for an authentic Spanish lifestyle.

To be a guiri, or not to be a guiri...

I am a guiri, have been for five years and probably will be for the rest of my life. I love it at times, but is it all that?

The official definition of a guiri is a foreigner or tourist in Spain. Whether you're a beered up Brit, sandal loving German, or baseball loving American, then the Spanish will see you as a guiri, no matter how long you stay.

The other day I was out walking with my fiancée and dog down San Jose Street just past the tapas bar Levies. The pavement on San Jose can be thin at times so we were walking in the road when this mad old Spanish bloke (mad because he was wearing a shirt and trousers in 40 degree heat) jogged into the road so that we could pass.
"Extranjeros primera, extranjeros primera," he said, smiling. He was being polite, moving out the way so that we could continue on the pavement. The funny thing was that he assumed my Spanish fiancée was a guiri too; it happens a lot due to her fair skin and hair.

Sevillanos aren’t always pleasant to guiris though. The other Sunday morning we were blatantly overcharged for breakfast in Alfalfa because the waiter thought we were guiris. When Chia started speaking in her Andaluz accent the waiter apologized and brought out the new, €3 cheaper, bill.

On various other occasions I’ve been overcharged for things so I’ve turned into a picky paranoid customer, checking every bill in case anyone is trying to get one over me, especially at the moment in the crisis.

Chatting with other Sevillaguiris, I’ve found that once you move out of the centre petty short changing stops. I work in Montequinto, a small town outside, and there no one would dream of treating you different.

Life can be great, but also hard, as a guiri. Apart from the obvious reasons of excellent weather, better food, and missing family and friends at home, here my top 6 reasons why I like and dislike being a guiri.

Pros

1- When the weekend arrives, in my case on Friday afternoon, I feel like I’m on holiday.

2- There’s more time. Working a 35 hour week gives much more time to enjoy the finer things in life, such as travelling, sampling good wine, and learning how to juggle.

3- The buzz. I still get that buzz when I wake up in the morning and remember that I live in Spain, and not in drizzly England.

4- Football. Sorry lads, but if you didn’t know then we get 2 live Premiership and 2 La Liga games every week, for free.

5- Speaking two languages. If I hadn’t made the plunge and decided to live in Spain, then I’d never have learnt Spanish. It’s a bizarre experience and something I recommend to everyone.

6- The simple life. In England everyone is busy rushing about trying to do this and that, earn as much as they can, and stress themselves out. I’m not saying living here is easy, but it’s simpler, and less stressful.

Cons

1- Not being able to pronounce my name. I’m not as gifted as other guiris at rolling their r’s. Saying my name is a chore. I normally end up getting called Bally, but now that Barry is playing for Manchester City more people know it.

2- Telephoning. This stems from number 1. Sometimes it’s impossible for me to order a pizza, try to change my mobile plan, query a doubt on my telefonica bill, because I can’t speak Andaluz. I normally go to the shop.

3- Cars not stopping at zebra crossings. This isn’t only for guiris, but it drives me mad. The worst are taxis, they’d sooner run over your foot that lose a couple of centimos stopping.

4- Football. Yeah, I know it’s a pro, but I do miss a good bit of footy banter and a live Prem game now and then. La Liga is good, but it’s just not the same.

5- The dry British sense of humour. I’ve lived with five different Spanish lads and none of them had a similar sense of humour. That’s not true for everyone, but generally a lot of my jokes go astray.

6- Knowing that I’ll always be a guiri. No matter how much I improve my Spanish or how many kids we have; I’ll always be el guiri inglés who can’t say his own name.

Fellow Sevillaguiris may agree, or disagree with my top 6, feel free to leave a comment. If you’re thinking of coming to live in Seville then I’d recommend it, that’s if you like the simple life, and especially if you can roll your r’s.

I wouldn't change being a guiri for the world.